Dry Run

As I've had responses nil I'm going to do a test run with a fictional character just so any potential readers can get the gist.

Name: Ted
Height: 6ft 5
Distinguishing features: Moustache and raven black hair and willowy figure.
Most common saying:
Last holiday: Croatia, 1 month. Parents paid even though I'm 26.
Spend most of my time: smoking or thinking about smoking.
Most often found: at the Hermit's Cave Camberwell sipping half pints of cider and looking out for one of my mates.
Can't say no to: Curly Wurlys and my Mum
Is enraged by: violence towards women
Once I: sleep-walked out of my house and locked myself out. Woke up in the back garden and was so embarrassed I pretended I had got up early and was roaming in the back garden to wake up. No one ever twigged.

Right...story coming right up...